Apart from the fact that my birth day is roughly a week from now, there is nothing notable that will take place in the weeks to come. I am still bearing a problem that has been keeping me out of concentration for three days now. This dilemma is something that I cannot share to anyone without me trusting the person with whole conviction. I could only assuage much of my internal struggles to an inanimate object at this very moment.
As I just took a seat in one of the two-seaters of this refrigerated bus, I marveled at everything around me. To my right, across this tempered window, are people trying to get to their businesses: Fast paced, without turning backs. Weird enough, I heard a church bell ring at the Edsa Shrine while I was inside an isolated space inside a bus. To my left and front, are people with earphones on, some spotting conversations with earphones on. How is it possible for them to hear the other? I wonder.
The bus conductor rings his coins in front of these people with headphones on. One guy gives him twenty bucks, the one with new design. The conductor surveyed him thoroughly as if subjecting him to an x-ray. "Cubao po, Farmers." The conductor pulls out three pieces from the bunch of tickets, and hands him several coins.
Everything is apparently an exchange of interactions. The moment you release your part, you must expect to receive another. This is a law according to Sir Isaac Newton. It so happened that, when I made that action, I received an unusual reaction. Energy is equal to the mass of an objected projected to the square of light's speed. By manipulating the variables, can a mass go back in time by changing the plane of reference?
I want time to go back, but when I think about it, I always think of the times when I thought of this, and why it didn't happen. There is no way to turn this back, the only event is for the present to continually move on, forward.
Of all people, why me? Why did this happen to me? A singular teardrop left my right eye and from surprise, I brushed it swiftly with the back of my hand. I could not believe that I will fall into the trap so easy. I was confronted with the fact that after all of my efforts to hide it, it resurfaces in one form to another. A disgrace, I am.
I was praying for the rest of my trip. For almost five years now, I have not prayed for that long. Being prayerful was my older self, and I needed to go back to that disposition. Ergo, the apostolic Joe.
With the aide of my friends, my family, and my brothers and sisters in Christ, I know that all things are possible.
This post was supposed to be published 1st of August. Right now, I can say that I have successfully got past that test.
Earlier in the church, I can't express the belonging that I had with His word: how it abashed me, got me naked but altogether healed my spirituality. Have a blessed Sunday. To Him be the glory!